Of course I love to eat and observe entertainment in the company of someone who may become the love of my life. It all seems very romantic and fun-filled.
However, boy meets girl too typically is who can use whom the most in the least amount of time. Whether one party is just looking for sex, money, fame, or entertainment, dating seems to be just another business transaction. Wouldn’t prostitution be more sincere and effective?
On average, the North American male will bear the expense of providing said entertainment and vittles. Some do this and hope. No, they expect to be compensated with sex. REALLY, sex for food? People may work for food, but Applebee’s two meals for 20 dollars hardly qualify for sexual reimbursement. I’m not even sure if a crack whore would be content with 10 dollars (their half of the Applebee receipt.)
Meanwhile, some women incur huge costs to attract or ensure a mate. Everything from hair, makeup, car fare, wardrobe, babysitting, mani-pedis, time off from work, facials, to plastic surgery take up a significant percentage of their annual yield. Are these women really supposed to dance for joy because some man splurged on a steak dinner or worse yet coffee? Usually the woman will incur hidden fees ten times what their date may pay. I am basing this on anecdotal evidence, but it does seem to be a correlation that if a man pays x, then a woman pays that and more.
If a woman wants a guy from an upper bracket, she better be ready to spend not just on appearance, but to circulate within his social scene. How else will she meet him if she doesn’t frequent the venues and events he attends? How else will her conversation be relevant or at least relatable if she doesn’t at least know some of his references?
The dating ritual is costly and time-consuming enough; it would be nice if the parties were sincerely interested in the other. If one is using the other, then it is just abuse. If the two are consenting adults that knowingly will abuse each other and enjoy it, then fine. At least they both know and accept the terms of their quasi prostitution.
However, there is something better, more elevated. I go on dates to find out more about a person that has sparked my interest. I can’t confess love and marriage during this stage, but I know this person has distributed traits that seem appealing. We have chemistry. We stimulate each other intellectually. Now, I wonder if we share similar beliefs about the household, religion, politics, extended family, money. Do we have similar goals and timelines? Are there any deal breakers or negotiables? I just want to get to know you so I can determine if you are right for me on a romantic level.
The date, especially the first, is not an oppurtunity for you to palm me, breathe all over my food, or otherwise inhibit my personal space at every possible chance. I don’t know you like that; I just DON’T KNOW you. I can stay at home and avoid all the inconvenience, expenditures, and awkwardness of a date. I have food at home that I can enjoy and know what’s in it for the most part. I just need a date to act like a rational human being and possibly share a few great moments. I’m hoping this year of the horse will provide me great dates and real love.
Vicarious Li 